Two weeks have passed since that doctor I don't like at our regular clinic said our baby would probably not live two weeks. I still feel movements. I really am dreading going back to see that woman for a heart check tomorrow, but might as well just let her do her job and make sure the kid really is still alive. If he makes it a little bit longer, we will go back to the specialist at the university next week for yet another ultrasound.
The bed rest was making me pretty crazy this morning. I felt like I wanted to start breaking things or maybe kill someone, so I talked Hubby into walking down to this nearby comic book store that we like. The people that work there are all really smart and funny and it was so great to be out doing something "normal" for awhile. We talked and laughed about mundane stuff and enjoyed thumbing through various comics and graphic novels. After I felt I'd had enough (ie. felt bleeding start again), I told Hubby we had to go and we took public transit home. I told him not to worry because I could not sanely deal with another full day on bed rest and even if something bad happened I wouldn't blame myself. The prognosis is already so bleak and the doctor actually told me to resume "normal" activities after that last visit. The only reason I rest is to keep the bleeding to a minimum, but sometimes it barely seems to make a difference.
Early in my pregnancy, a midwife told me that if a pregnancy was unhealthy, my body would miscarry even if I laid in bed all day. She also said that if the pregnancy was healthy and meant to be, it would stick, even if I ran marathons and carried toddlers around all day. In other words, nature plays a big part in how these things turn out. I realize my situation is unusual with the subchorionic bleed and the baby's growth problems, but doctors have passed the point of prescribing major interventions. As I said before, everything is one day at a time and just waiting and waiting until something happens for better or worse.
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